100,000zp Giveaway!!!
Comments
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IGN: algental
Twitch: mohamed_eldieb
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A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up.
Wow!," said her father, "That was ******* You usually talk for two hours. What happened?"
"Wrong number," replied the girl.... -
IGN: [C]ANA[D[IAN
Twitch name: B3llnogo17
Joke: Three aliens are looking for intelligent life on Earth and find a Newfie fishing in the Atlantic who happens to be singing Row, Row, Row Your Boat. The aliens then zap him and remove a quarter of his brain. The Newfie still sings Row, Row, Row Your Boat. The aliens were puzzled so they decide to remove half his brain. Still the Newfie keeps singing Row, Row, Row Your Boat. The aliens are amazed that the Newfie is still able to sing, so they decide to remove his whole brain. Surprisingly the Newfie still sang, but started singing frere jacques frere jacques. -
IGN: ymylovee
Twitch:Sirjack414
A man walks into a bar. The bartender says to the guy, "What can I get you?"
"Make it a whiskey," says the man who promptly throws it down in one gulp.
"That will be three dollars," says the bartender.
"Screw you!" says the man. "You offered to get me something. I thought you were paying."
"Get out," says the bartender. "You're banned. I don't need your crap."
Two years later, the same man walks into same bar with the same bartender.
The bartender looks at him and says, "You're the a**hole who tried to con a drink out of me, aren't you?"
"Excuse me, but I have no idea what you are talking about," says the customer. "I've never been to this bar before in my life!"
"Sorry. My mistake," says the bartender. "You must have a double."
"Hey thanks, dude!" says the customer. "Make it whiskey." -
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IGN: Jakeskills2
Twitch: Jakebekillinzz
Joke: Two guys get pulled over while drinking and driving.
The driver tells his friend, "Peel the labels off these beer bottles, and we'll each stick one on our forehead. Now, shove all of the bottles under the front seat. Just let me do all the talking."
The cop walks up and shines his flashlight into the car. "Have you been drinking?" he asks.
"No, sir," the drunk answers. "We haven't had a thing to drink tonight."
"Then what on earth are those beer labels doing on your foreheads?"
"We're both alcoholics," says the drunk. "We're on the patch."
![]JuLLs[](https://w5.vanillicon.com/v2/56395e2b6346701d43c1cb7c041f0618.svg)
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