The English language
This is a joke about the English language I found somewhere I don't remember now.
I'm not either american or english, but spanish... but I decided to learn English long time ago and to be honest. I like it more than spanish itself.
Anyway, there goes the joke.
[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends. [/FONT]
I'm not either american or english, but spanish... but I decided to learn English long time ago and to be honest. I like it more than spanish itself.
Anyway, there goes the joke.
[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends. [/FONT]
Comments
-
This is a joke about the English language I found somewhere I don't remember now.
I'm not either american or english, but spanish... but I decided to learn English long time ago and to be honest. I like it more than spanish itself.
Anyway, there goes the joke.
[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends. [/FONT]
For everything written in red there is an alternative.
Eggplant = Aubergine. The vegetable has the colour 'auberge'.
There is no ham, but there's pork in a hamburger.
The pineapple isn't pine, but it pines away as it's being eaten.
It's not originally from England, but as it's being sold in England, it is English.
French fried potatoes can be called 'chips'.
It does. If you happen to get sucked into quicksand, your first reaction is to move and to paddle. Moving makes you sink quicker and quicker.
A boxing ring is square indeed, but they were round like the fighting cages nowadays.
Guinea pigs nowadays are held as pets, but they originally lived in South-American regions. Including Guinea.
'To write' is a verb, 'to fing' isn't.
The word 'tooth' has a different etymological background as 'booth'.
Because you use 'to do' in the sentence, your sentence would be 'why didn't the preacher preach?'.
Humanitarian is linked to 'humanity', while vegetarian isn't linked to 'vegity' or anything similar.
Reciting is being done before actually playing. People play after they recited.
A driveway is being driven on to eventually park your car. A parkway is a way along an open area, which can be called a 'park'.
A house only burns down, you can't fully burn up a house.
'To fill out' is the American version of 'to fill in'.
The bell doesn't go, the bell sounds or rings.
'Race' in 'human race' has a different etymological background as 'race' in 'Formula one race'.
'The stars are out' = The stars are in the open. 'The lights are out' = the lights have been switched out.
'Winding up a watch' is to wind up the spring so your watch works again. 'To wind up' doesn't mean 'to end', it means 'to end up somewhere'.
There you go. Completely proved wrong. English is wonderful. -
Not really. You still don't demonstrate the irregularities of the language. Why isn't praught the correct word? It seems it should be if you know that the past tense of teach is taught.
The entire point is that English does have many weird points about it; and as the first post said, it's difficult for foreigners to learn. -
This is a joke about the English language I found somewhere I don't remember now.
I'm not either american or english, but spanish... but I decided to learn English long time ago and to be honest. I like it more than spanish itself.
Anyway, there goes the joke.
[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends. [/FONT]
For the two lines in red:
The teacher teach's and the preacher preach's.
Also, "praught" isn't even a word in the English language... I don't think so correct me if I'm wrong... My english isn't that good I failed it.. -
Not really. You still don't demonstrate the irregularities of the language. Why isn't praught the correct word? It seems it should be if you know that the past tense of teach is taught.
The entire point is that English does have many weird points about it; and as the first post said, it's difficult for foreigners to learn.
'To teach', sir, is an IRREGULAR VERB. It means it's NOT REGULAR. REGULAR verbs are the most common verbs. So if a verb is IRREGULAR, it means it's special and actually shouldn't exist . . . but does.
Generally every verb should be considered regular. Otherwise grammar wouldn't make any sense. So 'praught' can't exist.
In the poem the writer used 'why didn't the preacher praught?'
As you know (or possibly not), you always use the infinitive form after the verb 'to do'. Like this: "It did work after all, although I didn't think it would."
Underlined = conjugated form of 'to do'
Green = infinitive
So yes, I have owned the poem. -
I've noticed these things about my language myself, then mix in some slang ("bad is good" ) it's a wonder we know what we're saying to one another. British pride themselves on knowing "proper English" hahaha , I often times don't understand a word their saying. but it's cool to listen to
the worst is the people who learned to write English texting on their sister's cell phone. -
dear JP guy, not only was it ment as a joke which instead of enjoying you have wasted your time to "debunk". which you have sadly failed seeing as the writer of that certain..."poem" is clearlly stating that it is quite awkward that ...for example... the word "praught" does not exist while the word "taught" does.
"your mom" loves you. -
This is a joke about the English language I found somewhere I don't remember now.
I'm not either american or english, but spanish... but I decided to learn English long time ago and to be honest. I like it more than spanish itself.
Anyway, there goes the joke.
[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends. [/FONT]
C&P win
msg2obv -
[/COLOR]
For everything written in red there is an alternative.
Eggplant = Aubergine. The vegetable has the colour 'auberge'.
There is no ham, but there's pork in a hamburger.
The pineapple isn't pine, but it pines away as it's being eaten.
It's not originally from England, but as it's being sold in England, it is English.
French fried potatoes can be called 'chips'.
It does. If you happen to get sucked into quicksand, your first reaction is to move and to paddle. Moving makes you sink quicker and quicker.
A boxing ring is square indeed, but they were round like the fighting cages nowadays.
Guinea pigs nowadays are held as pets, but they originally lived in South-American regions. Including Guinea.
'To write' is a verb, 'to fing' isn't.
The word 'tooth' has a different etymological background as 'booth'.
Because you use 'to do' in the sentence, your sentence would be 'why didn't the preacher preach?'.
Humanitarian is linked to 'humanity', while vegetarian isn't linked to 'vegity' or anything similar.
Reciting is being done before actually playing. People play after they recited.
A driveway is being driven on to eventually park your car. A parkway is a way along an open area, which can be called a 'park'.
A house only burns down, you can't fully burn up a house.
'To fill out' is the American version of 'to fill in'.
The bell doesn't go, the bell sounds or rings.
'Race' in 'human race' has a different etymological background as 'race' in 'Formula one race'.
'The stars are out' = The stars are in the open. 'The lights are out' = the lights have been switched out.
'Winding up a watch' is to wind up the spring so your watch works again. 'To wind up' doesn't mean 'to end', it means 'to end up somewhere'.
There you go. Completely proved wrong. English is wonderful.
its called hamburger cause it was invented in Hamburg, Germany.
they call em Pineapples because ppl who discovered it thought it resembled a Pine Cone.
English muffins are of English origin, they are called "English Muffins" because of the influence from the old english nursery rhyme "the muffin man"
French Frying means deepfrying. so they are "Potatoes fried in French"
quicksand is just sand particles saturated with water. due to the high density of quicksand, it would be impossible for a human or animal to completely sink in the quicksand, though it traps you and you get owned by starvation, dehydration, ect.
too lazy to prove you wrong with the rest.
but tbh you kept spamming this link to the thread thinking that you owned someone even tho they were just trying to have fun, and that the riddle isnt even his. and you also troll others.
i wasnt gonna do this but seriously.
come on man -
dear JP guy, not only was it ment as a joke which instead of enjoying you have wasted your time to "debunk". which you have sadly failed seeing as the writer of that certain..."poem" is clearlly stating that it is quite awkward that ...for example... the word "praught" does not exist while the word "taught" does.
"your mom" loves you.
EXACTLY what i was thinking -.-
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